The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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