At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
