my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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