I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
