Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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