There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
