Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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