I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
