Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up

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(703): View more from Virginia

Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.

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(646): View more from New York

Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient

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(585): View more from New York

So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?

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(256): View more from Alabama

Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.

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(573): View more from Missouri

I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.

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(937): View more from Ohio

Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.

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(740): View more from Ohio

Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.

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