he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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