are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
