The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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