While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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