super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
