i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize