so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
