I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
