Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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