I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize