I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
