dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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