I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
