Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
