If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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