Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
