We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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