I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Randomize
