I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
