Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize
