there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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