idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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