did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
we're making bets on your personal life
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize