I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
