i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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