Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
