dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Randomize
