Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
