I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
