Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
