It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i wish my penis had a tongue
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
