dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
