Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
