He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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