Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
my being single is dangerous.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize