ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize