I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
