I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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