so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
