you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
