I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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